Still in flux…about to move…

So I’m getting to the point where I come up with hilarious blog titles and other things to write about all day and in the evening, and then when I have the time to sit down and write—> they’re all gone. The musings, everything disappears.  Perhaps if I recap the last few days I’ll remember what I wanted to tell you all.

Well, still can’t find the camera. Though G had a good idea for attempting to electronically send out the ultrasound money-shot of Thumbkin: take a picture of the picture with my digital camera- in a room with good lighting and no flash. He’s pretty smart. Of course, I can’t find my camera so that’s something we’ll have to try another time.

This morning the Volunteers of America came and took a bunch of furniture and other stuff that I donated because I quite frankly NEED TO GET RID OF STUFF because between the baby and G, who is apparently a pack-rat, I will be forced to live in another small-apartment-filled-with-too-much-stuff if I do not purge purge purge everything I own. This means I am tossing old cds (who buys cds anymore?!) VHS tapes (even though I still own -and occasionally use a working VCR), clothing that was originally meant to go to Goodwill a year ago, an old stereo, an old wine rack, an old kitchen table, a sofa, chairs, random kitchen supplies I have multiples of, etc. What am I NOT purging you ask? Any clothing that I have worn in the last year. I have absolutely no idea what will fit me when this who pregnancy business is over with. I have moments when I pass by my closet filled with adorable pants and I think, “I should just toss them. I’ll never get them even halfway up my thighs again.” But no, I’m not going to do it. I’m going to hold onto those pants because SOMEday, I’m going to either fit back into them, or use them as motivational tools by duct taping my skinny jeans to the refrigerator.  But it does feel really silly to move all of these clothes that I feel like I haven’t worn in forever, and that I perhaps may never wear again. Le sigh.

Which leads me to my next discovery: being pregnant prepares you for doing massive amounts of laundry for the rest of your life because eventually you’re going to get to the bottom of your Maternity Hand-Me-Down clothes at 7:30am on a work-day morning and realize that your last fitting CLEAN work-outfit is something you would make fun of another person wearing. I look ridiculous today. I looked in the mirror once I had it on and just decided that pregnancy is a big healthy dose of  realizing how vain and awful you are. 

The other night I told G that he’s officially schtupping a fat girl- how does that feel? I think he’s just glad I have an aversion to keeping the lights on.

On the baby front: I think I feel Thumbkin moving around in there more. It doesn’t feel so much like kicking as it does rolling around. I can’t decide if this is because I’m so concerned that he’s smushed in there or if it’s really a feeling. In the ultrasound I couldnt’ get over how cramped up he was. Prior to that ultrasound it appeared as though he had plenty of room to swim around like a little fish. And often, when I thought I felt something move in there, I would imagine it was like little air bubbles floating through my “fish tank-like” uterus with my little goldfish happily swimming from side to side.  Now I realize he’s just smushed in there looking uncomfortable. And how HOT it must get in there?!?!

So we’ve got the house mostly packed up and we get the keys tomorrow night. And then we’re going to measure rooms (for rugs) and windows (for curtains). And I’m going to check out the bathroom and closets (for storage areas) to see what I should start shopping for in regards to adorable storage containers. Yea– I’m excited for the house-stuff-buying. G, not so much. He thinks I’m going to make everything “all girly” which isn’t true at all. I think he thinks we get to turn the new place into a total dude-house because we’re having a boy. NOT SO, my friend.

And the old landlords (of my current apartment) just called to tell me they’ll be “showing” my apartment to potential tenants on Saturday at 10am, just as we start moving. Hahahahaha. That should be fun. 

Anyways, that’s what’s going on so far. Again, I have not a clue if any of this is stuff I wanted to share with you all before, but at least I’m blogging right?

More later, and I will keep looking for my camera…


This is going to be disappointing

Well, I know I promised pictures of my belly at 20 weeks, but I’ve seriously misplaced my camera. I am in the process of packing my apartment up and somehow I have lost my camera in the fray. So no belly pics until I find it, sorry. I even look kind of cute today.

Also- we found out….IT’S A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE is a boy. No questions. I was going to scan in a picture from the ultrasound and show you the goods that determined my man’s boy-ness, but alas, our scanner at work doesn’t properly scan ultrasound photos. I just spent 15 minutes trying to scan in a picture of my unborn child’s penis and can’t get it to show up electronically. But trust me- there is NO MISTAKE it is a boy. It was the first thing we saw: “man junk”.  Other things we saw were: a ginormous (measuring in teh 96.66 percentile) skull with a super smart working brain inside it, a beautiful heart with all chambers pumping away, a pretty liver and set of lungs that have yet to be tarnished by pollutants and alcohol. It was refreshing to see those things inside of me. Plus he has adorable little feet and hands. Oh and his lips and nose are so pretty. I know it’s difficult to imagine seeing all of this on a grainy ultrasound but trust me, he’s awesome.  The only thing I don’t like seeing is the spine and rib bones. They’re so tiny that he kind of looks like a fish and I don’t like the idea of having bones growing inside of me it’s weird. I’m REALLY glad he has them and all, I’d just prefer not to see them.

How do we feel about this boy news?! Excited! We have a kazillion boy names that we both like.  Almost everyone we know has boys so we’re also going to be getting enough hand me downs that I may never have to purchase clothing for the boy.

And it’s funny, all of the sudden G has noticed I am pregnant. Every so often he will point at my belly or smile at it now. I think that dragging him to the doctor allows him to see that I”m not just gaining ice-cream weight, but I’m actually growing a real person. It is his SON who is responsible for my pimply face and growing midsection. 🙂

So the doc said things were a-OK and wonderful. The only thing is we may have to go in for another ultrasound down the road to make sure the placenta is in the right spot. Right now he said it’s kind of low-lying, and if it doesn’t move we might have to do a c-section. This is scary, yes- but the thought of a c-section doesn’t terrify me in the same way that pushing a 8-10 pound baby through my vagina terrifies me. (My family makes big babies.)  All in all it just means I’ll get an extra glimpse of the bugger before he comes out which is FINE by me. 🙂

The first thing the boy got from his mom was a Tressel vest onesie and a hilarious book entitled Cowboy and Octopus. It was a fantastic weekend.


So I made it through the presentation, and even got some great compliments afterwards. It seriously felt like someone lifted 2000 lbs off of my back the minute it was over.  Now- of course I have other things to worry about.

Like- my a$$hole landlords wanting me to pay them $690 for the 5 days in April I’ll be “living” in their apartment. I offered to pay them $161 for the pro-rated amount of time I’ll actually be living there.  Psssst….landlords, you can kiss my fat ass.  It’s not happening.  Now I don’t know if I’m going to even give them that much. So I started packing. Packing like an insane lunatic. But I’m ready to getthehellouttathere because it’s a hellhole anyways. And did I mention that we’re acquiring baby stuff?!

Did I mention that I find out what Thumbkin is on Monday?! I have this uneasy feeling that immediately, upon learning the boy-or-girl-news I will want to rush off somewhere and buy…something…anything. I don’t know. Probably first to Buckeye Corner to either get the Jim Tressel onesie or the OSU Cheerleading outfit. I mean, my doc’s office is in the SAME PLAZA as the Buckeye Corner, so that’s gotta mean something.

My friend Ria just found out she’s having a boy. And I had to laugh at her picture because WOWZA that is a boy.  I suppose that if you’re sitting on the camera it’s going to be very easy to determine. But it just made me wonder how Thumbkin is laying.  Next week the baby will be as “long as a banana” according to one web site I’ve visited…so G says we need a new name for Thumbkin. “Bananakin” just is too hard and sounds too close to Anakin.

So I don’t know. I’m just excited for the next two weeks. I look at next week’s schedule and think, “Holy shit on Wednesday I will know if I’m ever going to have to have the Period talk with my daughter, or if I’ll just buy condoms and place them strategically throughout the house when my baby boy grows into a teenager.” Whoa. Either way, the child- boy or girl, will likely not get away with ANYthing. G and I have already done it- guaranteed, and we probably still would be finding out more rotten things to do if we hadn’t gotten pregnant. We wrote the book on bein’ naughty so GOOD LUCK KIDDO! It won’t matter anyways, since Thumbkin will be incredibly busy becoming an extremely talented genius so G and I can quit working. He or she won’t have time to be naughty. Hahahah. I know, I hear your chuckles through the screen.

more clothing and starting to pack up

Well between now and March 25th I really have no business, and I mean NO BUSINESS doing anything other than working on this presentation I have next week. But the weather is just now starting to change- my attitude in general is improving (about everything except for my largeness) and we’re moving- so I need to be packing, too.

I believe my belly has officially “popped” which means — my pre-prego pants really don’t fit me. And at least I look less like a fat-ass and more like a pregnant person now. Maybe. I think it still depends on what I’m wearing. Yesterday I wore these maternity pants that come all the way up to your boobs. I never understood why or how this worked. But, I have a better understanding now, and was quite comfortable all day wearing pants that look like this. I have another pair that I might put on today. My mom took me shopping so I have some options to choose from in the clothing arena, so I don’t feel like a hideous cow everytime I leave the house. G still disagrees with my shoe choice with EVERY outfit (tennis shoes) but I don’t care. My main concern is not looking like a doofus and comfort. He’s stuck with me, we can worry about putting this train wreck back together once the baby’s out of me.

Packing. Ah. Really we haven’t done much of that, but I did manage to throw away a BUNCH of stuff I have been meaning to throw away for over a year. Seriously- weird stuff like old throw pillows, old rugs that match nothing I own, roller blades, 3D Disney princess castle puzzles (I know), that kind of thing. We filled up the back of G’s truck and dumped it off at the Salvation Army. G said, “Even homeless people will scoff at this donation: shakespeare house slippers?!” Haha. I said “If they’re homeless they’ll just want the slippers and not care who’s on them.”

The spare bedroom (which was at one point Lisa’s room) is now my maternity clothing and Thumbkin-stuff hoarding room.  There are clothing donations from friends and family who will “no longer be needing the clothes” and some even told me they NEVER WANT TO SEE THEM AGAIN with great ferocity. So have piles of clothes-to-return, clothes-to-donate, and clothes-to-wear-as-you-continue-to-expand. You might think this is fun or nice to have the extra options for clothing. It’s definitely better than the alternative (which is trying to squeeze into what I own and fashioning the belly band to work with it– would. not. happen.) but having piles of fat clothes laying around for the next time (probably in a few weeks) you roll out of bed and can’t fit into your normal pants again….it’s depressing.

I need to see the baby again. Seeing or hearing the baby makes me remember that I am not getting fat for no reason. It also makes me all gooey and mushy and “Oh I can’t wait to snuggle you-like”.

Last night I had a dream that we got a golden retriever and we named her Lucky. I woke up and told G this. He is staunchly against having pets, and last night told his mother so on the phone. I heard, “No, and we’re not interested.” (Apparently she’d asked if we’d like to adopt the stray puppy they found…awwww….) When I told G my dream this morning, this is how it went:

Me: I had a dream we got an adorable golden retriever and we named her Lucky

G: Nope, not happening.

Me: It was just a dream, gosh.

G: Nope.

Me: I think Thumbkin will melt your heart and make you a softy and you’ll want to get a puppy for Thumbkin.

G: Nope, I don’t care how much the kid complains and whines, we’re not getting a dog.

Me: Someday maybe.

G: Probably not.

Me: Well it will be two-against-one, we win.

G: Ha! No.

I’m still not convinced. I think we’ll soften him up. I”ve already softened him up a ton, and he freely admits it. I don’t want a dog yet, but I don’t want to rule it out FOREVER> jeesh.

Alright I’m going to go do something. Probably eat, but maybe go on a walk or pack. We’ll see.

And I’m going to try to include a baby bump picture here so you all don’t think I’m lying. I think this would be circa 17/18 weeks? So yea. And I know I don’t look that big from the side but from the front I feel like a trailer.  I always swore I wouldn’t put these pictures on the internet, but since my face isn’t in it, and this isn’t my facebook or myspace page, I figure it’s alright. Plus I haven’t shared this address with a ton of people. So here’s my gut.

17 weeks or so?
17 weeks or so?


Our New Apartment
Our New Apartment

Well, we finally got an apartment. I’ve been searching and searching and we finally settled on one that we both liked- and it’s a three bedroom. I wanted a three bedroom so badly because I want people to be able to STAY at our house and be comfortable in a queen sized bed. Now that my family is all adults- and coupled off- I hate having to make them sleep on an air mattress. With this apartment they’ll be able to sleep in a real “guest bedroom”. AND- the baby has a room!!! Thumbkin will not have to sleep in a closet or dresser drawer. The bedroom will actually hold a crib and possibly a dresser as well. The bathroom has a claw foot tub and the kitchen has a dishwasher. It’s walking distance to the park and a cute little coffee shop. I even got special permission to have Gunner (my nephew) come visit on weekends, no problem. So I feel better. Now just to figure out more stuff on the financial aspect of moving and having a baby– hmmm….

will spring ever come?

This morning I was eating my breakfast of Eggo waffles and pre-cooked sausage, and G was laughing at me as a string of syrup nearly went down the front of my bathrobe. I told him, “Don’t judge me.” I eat a lot these days.  I’m making an effort to eat healthy- apples and oranges and bananas and brocoli- when I can, sometimes, mostly during the day…but I am definitely getting bigger in places that are NOT carrying a baby: specifically my legs/ass region. I am not happy about this. In my experience, the only things that get rid of weight in this region are: eat less, run, squats with weights. I’m NOT doing a squat. The thought has crossed my mind like twice and it’s just not happening. I’m also not running. But when the weather finally gets nice, I would like to briskly walk around outside in my neighborhood in order to impede the fat cells for accumulating further on my netherregions. But is’s still so flipping cold it probably won’t heat up unti I’m too fat to move, much less leave the house. Boo!

We found an apartment that we REALLY REALLY LIKE! We put an application down on it- and now we’re just awaiting the credit check- which is unbearable. About 8 months ago I consolidated my student loans AND my credit cards. This means I closed the accounts and started paying an outside company one big payment that they send out to my card companies. The benefits are: the outside company (nonprofit) got my interest rates down to 5-6% so I am actually paying off the card and not just paying off the monthly interest rate. The bad part: I don’t have a credit card and pretty much live paycheck to paycheck. I mean, I have a lot more money now that I”m not spending it at the bar 4 -5 nights a week, and I’m saving what- like $40+ a week on cigarettes, so lately I’ve felt like I have more money than I used to anyways. But I just worry what this recent credit consolidation will look like on whatever kind of credit check the new landlord puts through. Oh gosh we really love this place. It’s hideous on the outside, and the inside is all retro-seventies style. ORANGE countertops in the kitchen! I love it. We still have a few other places to see but paid $35. each for the background check on this one that we like. The landlord said, “I’m sorry but if you’re not married I have to charge you each $35 instead of doing one check for the both of you…” Yet another person insulting our decision to not get hitched right away. Does anyone EVER think things through anymore? Jeesh.

So we should know this week if our credit is good enough for this place. And if it is- we move the second weed of April. ?! SO EXCITED! I’m going to throw away half of what I own in a spring cleaning binge first. IT’s going to feel so good.

Pregnancy related updates: I’m fairly certain that Thumbkin kicked me at 6:39 this morning, and then two more times around 8am when I couldn’t get comfortable in bed. It did not feel like a fart really. I was sitting really still and paying close attention to my belly because it feels weird in the mornings, and that’s when it happened. It was WEIRD> I’m hoping I will feel them more obviously later on because this time it was sort of anti-climactic like a burp or something.  I can still fit into pants that are a size or two too big. I’m going to the doctor today for a normal “check up” and I’m going to ask them why they’re asking for us to pay for the delivery and everything (in full) by May 24th when I’m not due until mid August. I don’t pay for half-cooked food at a restaurant, why would I pay for a half-cooked baby? Hmmmmm?????? Anyways, I’m hoping they can lend some insight into that nonsense. I might be getting some genetic test done today….but I don’t really know why. They’re basically going to give me a bunch of math numbers and ratios that I won’t really understand. I mean, a BAD outlook would be “Your baby has a 1 in 300 chance of having Downs Syndrome”…1 in 300 doesn’t sound that bad to me. I’m really terrible at math though. And maybe I’m wrong, and that testing isn’t happening at this appointment. I don’ teven know. Because that’s what else is happening: my brain has gone on the fritz. I forget things and have become completely irresponsible (moreso than before!).

Meh, oh well. If anything else happens I’ll update later tonight. Also- this font is really tiny isn’t it? I can’t decide on a layout. I may piddle around with that, too. Hope you’re all having a great day and stay tuned for better postings later….


*Baby sounds good, so far no news on AFP test. Also will only cost $500 (only?!) to have baby and I can pay it as I go. (I think.)