It’s Sunday, guess what we did today…

No really, guess.

We went to Lowe’s again!!! This time we got more spray paint to finish painting the fence outside, and G got a brand new chainsaw thing. (Pardon the baby in this picture.)

he says it's not a chainsaw
he says it's not a chainsaw

But it looks like a chainsaw to me. G says they are 

Man vs. Nature.
Man vs. Nature.

hedge clippers, so we could attack the man-eating bush that has overgrown our (very small) portion of the backyard. We wanted to clean it up a bit so people could actually sit in the backyard and enjoy a cookout without being swallowed by the ginormous bush/tree combo that our neighbors have in their yard.

spray painting the fence
spray painting the fence

G has asked me to create a List of things for him to do. He calls me “boss” and says, “What’s next on the list, boss?” I kind of like it and kind of hate it because sometimes all I can think of is Boss Hogg from the Dukes of Hazzard. But he’s right- I am the boss mostly. But I took some pictures of him doing chores. I like watching him work. And I help a little bit– when I can……more later


hospital tours and more

Whoa, this is how I feel today:

gunner passed out
gunner passed out

Pay no mind to the big drool stain on my couch (and thanks Gunner!). This past weekend I dog-sat my furry nephew Gunner again, and took him on numerous long walks in the hot weather. He was so tired that he could barely walk when we got home. I felt the same way. I still do in fact.  It’s funny how much more tired I am these days. This morning I woke up feeling like I worked out yesterday, even though I hadn’t. Just achy in general. So bizarre. And the sleep I’m getting is that weird in-between-sleep that doesn’t really count. It’s like taking a 20 minute nap when you don’t ever really fall completely asleep and you don’t ever feel completely rested. You just feel awake and tired. I’ve felt that way for about a week now, and I realize this is probably as good as it gets. Meh, whatever.

This past weekend was also Memorial Day weekend. I worked on Saturday, but then Sunday G and I went to Lowe’s and got some flowers. This entire outing took entirely too long for both G and I. It was hot and miserable and our cart was shitty and kept going askew instead of straight where we’d push it. We always laugh at the people at Lowe’s since there are always couples there getting into domestic disputes and arguments. “You’re such a GD asshole my godwhat’syourproblem!?” THESE ARE THINGS I OVERHEAR AT LOWE’S EVERYTIME WE GO THERE. Inevitably G and I get into a discussion over this versus that, and it never escalates, but he tries to make a scene just so we fit in, and then I laugh so hard I end up having to pee. Yes, I can tell you where the restroom is at Lowe’s and Home Depot. What of it?!

We ended up getting these plants:

our cart at lowe's
our cart at lowe's

which ended up costing like $70 or something which I believe is pure shit. I mean, there’s no guarantee I won’t end up killing these things and YES we already discussed how we probably should’ve tried the plant thing or the pet thing before attempting the parenting thing. We just never wanted that much responsibility. Ha!

Then after our Lowe’s outing we went on a walk with our friend Ryan and the dog up to get ice cream at Jeni’s. This time I had lemon blueberry and reisling pear. The girl said, ‘Be careful-it’s really soft due to the all the alcohol in it…” and I was like, “BRING IT!” Yea I did not get a buzz from the ice cream, bummer. But it was quite tasty on that hot hot day.

Monday we then had cinnamon rolls at home and ended up cooking out. A few friends came over and it was a good time. Still I was exhausted by the end of the day. G ended up planting some of the flowers we got last night with the only gardening tool we have: a plastic child’s Spongebob Squarepants trowel that we bought at Lowe’s. It worked though. And we have an adorable little toad who likes the basil and lavender plants we put in the the flower bed. He’s so cute!

I could go on and on about work but I’m not going to- but mainly you should know that we’re getting to that time of year where schools are letting out and we’re about to be infiltrated by massive amounts of bored children and their parents who are looking for something, anything to do with their kids that is free. Of course we promote coming-to-the-library and we WANT them there….but somedays I wish there was a disclaimer attached to that sentiment…like:  (*assuming your children are well-behaved and not maniacs, YES we would LOVE to have them*) but that would never fly, and I should be ashamed for even thinking such a thing. So yea, we’re getting busier and busier with angry people and bored kids. It’s awesome. Add onto that the time on my feet in uncomfortable shoes and you have one happy lady at the end of the day!

Tonight was our big Hospital tour, which I thought might be unnecessary but after going through it I’m really glad we did. First off, I grew up being INCREDIBLY familiar with one hospital in particular. It is a tiny tiny hospital in comparison to the one where I’ll be giving birth. The hospital is color coded for your convenience, Yellow, Blue, Green, Red, etc. The women’s center is Yellow- and there are two floors you might be on within the Labor and Delivery– either 3 or 5. I’m hoping for 3 since it’s one of my favorite numbers. Anyways, we were there at the “tour” with two other couples- one due in August and the other in October. When I hear someone say they’re due after me, it makes me feel so good now- like there IS an end in sight and yes there WILL be a baby coming out of here soon. Ironically, there are butterflies painted on the walls of the hallways in the maternity areas (I have an irrational fear of butterflies). G says he remembers everything from the tour, but I felt way bombarded with information. I’m sure I would get lost the next time I’m there. Most of the time I was too busy sizing myself up in comparison to the other lady that was due in August, and wondering how those adorable (but seemingly ginormous) babies in the nursery could ever come out of my body…YIKES.

Anyways, the rooms at the hospital offer a host of things- birthing balls, cd player, dvd player, and we are welcome to bring our iPod docking station. And I asked G, “What kind of playlist do we play in labor?” You’re allowed to use cellphones and the wireless in the hospital, no problems. The place just seems really- unhospital-like which is GOOD. 

It was freaky to be there, but I’m glad we went. I don’t think we’re going to do a childbirth class, mostly because they’re over $100 and we can both think of a million other things that money could go towards. Instead we’ve rented a bunch of library DVDs to watch. I’ve had them for two weeks and no we haven’t watched them…but that’s because I also have Six Feet Under and Notorious to watch…

I have some other funny things I wanted to tell but I’m not concentrating right now…I’m so tired and I just kind of want to lay down…. Will promise to write more interesting stuff later…

Swear words

There are some serious swear words echoing throughout our apartment, and this time it’s NOT ME. G and I decided to do some smallish projects that we started this weekend. Very small, do-able projects like: taking the cabinet doors off of the vanity in the bathroom, sanding, staining and replacing the hardware on them because they previously were disgusting. By disgusting I mean, they were old, not sealed, kind of peeling in places, etc. G offered to do this project. “Great idea!” I exclaimed- because I had a friend coming in from out of town who also wanted to do some DIY stuff around the house. Awesome.

Around 9am on Saturday I think it was, I decided I wanted to paint one wall of the baby’s room blue. The bedding and pattern of the nursery set I have been given is tan and green. It is impossible to match the green. But as I mentioned in a previous post, the room made me nervous upon entering it. It felt cramped and it definitely needed something. Over the weekend I decided that “thing” was pastel blue paint to match the elephant in the nursery bedding. So we painted it blue. I’m happy with the blue wall. I may post pictures soon. Maybe.

But we keep running into smallish obstacles while doing projects. These are the things that make G cuss loudly: finding out that the wall we’re hammering into is made of three separate substances, such as sheet metal, plaster and brick. OR- you find out that the holes in the cabinets for the bathroom vanity are 2 inches apart instead of 3 inches apart, which is the standard size for all pulls one may want to replace.

All of this will lead to multiple trips to Home Depot and Lowe’s (often in the same day) for different kinds of screws, nails, hardware seeking attempts, and finally silver metal spray paint so we can just spruce up the old hardware and put it back on the damned vanity already because WE RENT, WHY ARE WE EVEN TRYING!?!?!?!?!?!

But anyways, I mentioned G got me the sweet flowers and card (that nearly made me cry) for Mother’s Day. And I had numerous well wishes and cards from family and friends, and more cds from my sister (you rock) and an awesome gift of ginger-scented body lotion and bath soaps from my friend Mandy. I felt special, but it’s hard to feel like a mom when your kid is swimming in your gut instead of sitting on your lap.

And this weekend said friend Mandy came from Chicago to visit me and we had an awesome weekend of food, visiting and shopping around- even though I didn’t buy much it was still just nice to have a friend to go do things with. She helped me paint the wall in the nursery, and cooked us both breakfast and dinner. Then my brother Brett came to visit on Sunday with his dog Gunner- and enjoyed the delicious meal that Mandy made (ribs in the crock pot with mashed potatoes, corn on the cob and green beans, fresh strawberries and blackberries) and chatted for a while.

It was a good weekend and I was glad to enjoy it with such a great friend who’s known me forever. After all of that – the great meals she cooked, and the awesome Mother’s Day gift she gave me, today when I came home from work there was yet ANOTHER gift from Mandy in a package on my front porch: a house-warming gift. It is really really cool- a magnetic spice rack that hangs on the wall. G and I both love it! Now, Mandy- if you’re reading this STOP BUYING THINGS NOW! 🙂 I can’t keep up with the thank-you notes!

I hope everyone reading this had a good weekend as well and I hope for all of our sakes that there are more leisurely spring weekends ahead as the weather continues to get nicer in Ohio.

Incredibly cool hanging spice rack
Incredibly cool hanging spice rack
work in progress...
work in progress...
sleeping lambs
sleeping lambs


So tonight we went to Lowe’s. Again. We needed different screws to finish putting up our borrowed pot-rack in the kitchen.

I’ve had a bad couple of days. I think G picked up on this last night when I couldn’t sleep and tonight when I got home he wasn’t playing video games. Instead he was making suggestions on things we could do. Here were my options for entertainment tonight:

“We could hang up the pot-rack, I’ll need your help with that.”

“We could warm up that leftover pizza and make ravioli.”

“Or we could go out to eat, but we do have leftovers.”

“Or we could watch the rest of that movie and then watch another movie that we have here…”

So I said, “Sure- because my other options are sleeping and….staring.”

So we heated up pizza. He made ravioli. We started to hang the pot rack and the screws didn’t work. So we went to Lowe’s. And as we’re walking up and down the aisles at Lowe’s looking for more heavy duty screws, I hear the song
“You are the Sunshine of my Life” and start to cry because dammit, this is a depressing way to live. No wonder people don’t want to hang out with us. There used to be a million fun things to do on any given night. And now I’m at Lowe’s in my pajama pants feeling like the skin on my stomach is stretching so far it will never, ever bounce back without some sort of surgical help eventually. I can’t really explain this to G or my mom or anyone because people don’t quite get it. Or, I just want to start crying and would rather not end up blubbering so it’s just easier not to talk about it.

I just honestly can’t believe that this is it. This cannot be “it” for me. People who don’t own homes shouldn’t spend this much time at Lowe’s. Sad part? I was excited just to get out of the house.

Anyways, I’m no fun to be around. I wish I could sleep until August.

And all day today I wanted a cigarette today as badly as I did on the first day I quit. I think cigarettes might have been my actual friends before. At least there were 20 of them per pack. At least if I was bored then I could say, “I’m smoking” even if I was sitting and staring.