So I decided that I wanted to try one of those adorable surveys where you ask your child to answer questions. I said, “Okay let’s play school!” He immediately pulled his chair up to me and I got out my laptop. I asked the first question, “What is your favorite food?” Simon’s hand shoots up. “Yes, Simon?” I ask. “I’m not Simon, I’m Dan.” I say, “Okay Dan, what’s your favorite food?” “Dinosaurs!” Simon, I mean Dan, answers.
It takes me a minute but I realize now that he is playing the character Dan from some television show he zones out to at the sitter’s house. We don’t have this show but the sitter has mentioned to me several times that Simon really enjoys it, and that she thinks it’s a weird show because Dan has an imagination and everyone just plays along with poor Dan, who thinks he’s surrounded by dinosaurs. (Don’t get me started.)
Instead of arguing with Dan/Simon, I just continued to ask the questions, and typed answers as they came flowing from the mouth of babes/Dan/Simon.
food- oranges! Snack foods!
game- “On my leappad?” No, not really- games you like to play in real life. “Uuhhhh the couch game. It’s me in the other room. I sit then you move it. You get off the couch and then sit on the couch.”
toy-“I’m going to run away from school. I’m coming back to school. I fell over. I fell over in my chair. Help! (he points at pirate and knight Playmobil figures) Those guys. That car.”
movie-“Uh, this one” (pulls out Cinderella, which we haven’t watched yet. I say, “No, Dan, you really like Mary Poppins…remember?” He says, “Mary Poppins is broken.” (In truth, Mary Poppins was left at Grandma’s so we told him it was broken.)
color-“Red. Red is my favorite color. Not green, but red.”
I really like to wear- “Muscle shirt. I need to go poop”
At this point I must go assist Dan in the restroom. Since we’re already upstairs, I decide it’s the perfect time to coerce him to try and nap. It’s only been 10 minutes but he is quiet up there. I’m going to try and do something with all these Christmas decorations. More later.
When I grow up I want to be- signs firefighter then points and says “A pirate! a REAL Jake! Momma guess how i’m gonna grow up. I’m gonna be a real Jake. And I won’t be mad. He’s a nice pirate. Jake is a nice pirate.”
I would describe myself as- holds arms out and says, “a worker.” What do you work on? “Oh, I’m Simon. Not a worker. I wish-I wish Carie would stay. I wish Lisa would stay here. I wish all your friends could move in.” (final sentence prompted by daddy)
Unfortunately this is where the survey ends, because a 3.5 year old has too many things to do in order to slow down and answer mom’s dumb blog survey.